Number of Drinks Consumed: 12,048
Number of calories I consumed: 500,000,000
Number of cigarettes I smoked: 9,000
Number of times my heart almost stopped: 3
Number of boys I made out with: 2
Number of boys I went home with: 2
Number of boys I went home with over the age of twenty-three: 1
Number of sailors I went home with: 0
Number of bartenders I went home with: 1
Number of tattoos he had: 401
Combined weight of boys i hooked up with: 160
Number of dogs that I took care of that quite possibly had the mange: 1
All and all a pretty solid weekend. Well, all was solid except for what came from my bowels. Not so solid. Ew.
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